Illicit desires
phantoms of my brain
I made them my reality
held them close to my heart
clung on to them
did not want to let them go.

In most private moments
when I'm undressing, or bathing
when I'mdreaming
you are there with me
you live inside my head
all the time

Do you have two existences?
The real you... and the
you inside my head-- it's scary!
I wonder if that makes you
actually there with me
in secret, private,personal moments

And then, I see the real you
you avert your gaze, walk past me
and leave me wondering...

May 2008